with every popular text post you make, you get a free tour through the Museum of Terrible URLs
I forgot the word “reindeer” today so I described them as “Christmas llamas” why
oh my god my friend is so innocent, her boyfriend got a boner in the pool and she felt it and screamed before making him apologising for getting horny
Accordion to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.
im so fucking angry
when u make hot chocolate and take it out of te microwave and the handle is 2000 degrees i created u i gave u life why must u hurt me
shrimp are referred to as an abomination four times more than homosexuality is in the bible
I forgot my mom followed me on twitter